Chuck has written another article, this time describing what happens if he gets named as Vice President…for either ticket:

• If he continues to develop nuclear weapons, I will change the last name of the Iranian president from Ahmadinejad to Smith or Johnson — just because I can. For as long as I’m in office, his country will be renamed from “I-ran” to “You’d-better-run.”
• I will force all government leaders and agencies to follow the Constitution and Bill of Rights or deport them immediately to their new “Guantanamo Bay offices” in the newly incorporated U.S. territory of the North Pole.
• Because America will be a Chucktatorship and because I’m tired of the bickering of partisan politics, I am going to unite the Republicans and Democrats into one party, called the “Republicrats.”
• In order to slash the deficit, instead of Congress receiving cushy pensions that are more like lotteries, I will turn back the salary clock to the good ol’ days from 1789 to 1815, when members received per diem payments of $6 (for only the days they worked). Or maybe I’ll fight for the proposal of Benjamin Franklin, who, during the Constitutional Convention, considered recommending that elected officials receive no payment at all for their service because they should execute their duties out of love for their country and its citizens.
• Once I’m in office, the Texas court system will handle all future federal and state court cases. All parties involved will be allowed full and fair hearings under our “Alamo Due Process.”

He’s got my vote.